The “familiar” keeps us with a person an allows us to continue to put up with the obnoxious, irritable and nonsense that we wouldn’t regularly put up with elsewhere. Generally this occurs because one aspect of your partner has a deep thick hook in you (weakness you have for them). Like I spoke about when avoiding certain types of characteristics of the opposite sex, if you are already in a relationship with someone possessing one of those characteristics then it’s probably time to GET OUT!
Easier said than done right? Well you can continue to become more miserable, continue the bickering and enjoy the make-up sex (which I don’t deny is great), yet wake up the next morning in the same situation, the same vicious cycle. The alternative is to suck it up; walk away from what you know is not right for you or them. Be PATIENT, wait on that special someone who is more ideal for the long term.
*Note*: Most people jump into another relationship without taking time to regroup, learn the good/bad of what has just occurred and just be by themselves! It is crucial to identify who you were before and who you have become after a relationship (trust me relationships because of compromise and growth, to a degree changes an individual).The “void is my biggest pet peeves but also the most popular amongst men and women these days. This is where you need the feeling of someone chasing/desiring you, which also has all the makeup of a relationship, yet you don’t want to commit because they are just not quite what YOU want. If they are not what you want then why continue to waste their time and your own? To fill the void until “THE ONE” comes along or something better fills your void? For those of you who don’t believe in karma I will be the first to tell you what goes around comes around!
Its one thing to have an open relationship, it’s another to try to be a player!
I don’t know of anyone who doesn’t want a great relationship and true love. How do you find that though in a selfish world where everyone is stepping over everyone to get what THEY desire and press on until they ultimately are ready to settle down?
It’s about becoming aware and rethinking what you as an individual sees as a good relationship & as a real partner for your life.
I pose these questions for you to first ask yourself and then ask your mate (if applicable):1. Are you cherished? How do you treat your mate/lover? How do you desire to be treated?
2. Can/Are you liked? Is their an appreciation? Do you and your friends go out to complain about your mate/lover?
3. Can you Trust them? Can you be trusted? How safe do you feel with the person you are with?
4. Is their Love? What is real love to you? Can you see yourself falling in love?
5. What is sex to you? Is it the definition of a relationship?
My pastor said this past Sunday “to bare the trust of another person, you are putting that persons soul in danger”. Too many people do not understand/miscommunicate their emotions to another person. Timing is very important in developing a relationship for the simple fact if one person is in 100% and the other one isn’t then it can be damaging if the relationship is carried out or sex is the only content (booty calls/friends with benefits). You will be surprised to know how many people are not on the same page!
Truly it can be prevented by communication but seriously we all know that a lot of people out there have problems with communication. Be the one to speak up, get a sense for what is going on in your relationship (whether friends or more)!
5 ways to know that you are in a great relationship:
1. You are Cherished
2. You are Liked
3. Their is Trust
4. Feel Loved
5. Real Sex (meaning not just lust/basis of your relationship)
If you are not yet in a relationship then keep these things in mind when you are with that potential special someone.
MAY THE FORCE BE WITH YOU!
Fu Lu Shou
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